 Strategies for Success |
Same Page Parenting takes Support!
Raising a child is a team effort that requires a cooperative partnership. Your partner in parenting is whoever shares the ups and downs of daily life with you and your child. A partnership requires that parents work from the same page and express support for each other on a daily basis. Make the tips below a daily practice in your partnership.
| Tag Each Other “Out” When Things Become Heated |
More often than not, discipline is a sticky, tricky issue. An aggravated, disappointed and stressed out parent is not best suited for discipline time. When emotions are running high and voices are being raised, it’s time to step in and provide relief. The next time you see steam coming out your teammate’s ears, calmly suggest they walk away and let you “take it from here.” Parents, if your partner tags you “out,” don’t take offense. Take the opportunity to cool down and remind yourself that your partner is helping because you work as a team. If you are encouraged to take a break by your teammate, don’t protest or attempt to stay in the situation. Feel confident that your partner wants what is best for you and your child.
| Parent from the Same Page |
Although it is hard to be on the same page, it is critical that you take the time to agree to get on the same page! Children take parents most seriously when they present themselves as a unified front. The best way to become a unified front is to discuss and agree upon household rules before a problem arises. Talk about the common problem behaviors that you are running into and decide upon consequences for these behaviors. Once you have established the rules, commit to sticking with them. This eliminates confusion about “what’s going on” when one parent enters a discipline situation already in progress. Support your partner by making it clear to your child that you will follow through with the same consequences that have already been outlined. In time your child will realize there is no point in attempting to finagle the consequences of his or her behavior, making discipline a faster and less frustrating issue.
| Have a Daily Support Recognition Exchange |
Commit to add “partner recognition” to your list of daily habits! Establish a regular time each day when you will thank your partner for one thing he or she has done that day to support you in your parenting practices. Request the same of your partner. It can be as simple as remembering your partner’s favorite snack on the grocery trip or as grand as stepping during a heated homework battle to relieve your stressed out teammate. During this exchange, do not air any grievances or criticize your partner. Save that for another time. Be sure to look into your partner’s eyes and find a way to sincerely say “Thank You.”
Authors:
Charlotte Fudge, RN, BCABA
Allison Hanley, BS/BA
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